You’re right Amy. I’m guessing that underneath the “why” is a bunch of emotions. Frustration being one of the most common. Thanks for making this suggestion, I think it would be great if we, as parents, could identify our own emotions and name them first, “I’m feeling so frustrated!”

Thank you so much for brining this up. It’s so hard to not ask “why.” I feel like with me it’s often just my exasperation talking anyway. “Why did you do this?” really means, “I am so frustrated!” I find if I can remind myself that part of my job as a parent is to teach, and to EXPECT mistakes, then it lowers my frustration considerably. (Keeping this in mind is the trick!)

Having some key phrases and tools at hand that you offer can really help keep me focused on the tasks at hand – 1. controlling my own emotions, and 2. helping my child control theirs and problem solve a situation. Thanks so much!