Comments on: How to stop tantrums according to brain research

By: Stacey

Stacey — Sun, 28 May 2017 09:50:10 +0000

In reply to Michelle Sharit. I really like this. Am going to try it. Thanks!

By: Amanda

Amanda — Tue, 06 Sep 2016 12:40:24 +0000

In reply to Jessi. I feel the same way most of the time, only difference is my kids are 5 and 6. But the biggest problem we have is extended family constantly telling me i suck as a mom then going to my kids and telling them they don't have to listen either by their words or actions. I have backed away from them (extended family) but they keep pushing over the boundaries and we are so confused and the kids don't know who to trust anymore. Guess its a work in progress lol. Blessing

By: Katie P.

Katie P. — Tue, 06 Sep 2016 11:06:17 +0000

In reply to Gary Cassidy.

hey Gary, my son was recently “diagnosed” with SPD (sensory processing disorder), so I’m wondering if you have any suggestions for what to do before his tantrums start….i would LOVE any ideas 🙂 I haven’t tried getting at or below his level, so I’ll definitely be trying that, but we do a lot of re-stating and the empathy technique, and while sometimes it works, it feels like often it just makes him more angry.

By: Vicki

Vicki — Tue, 06 Sep 2016 10:18:17 +0000

Have learnt this through Playcentre training and put into practise often. Just last night my 6 year old was having a hissy fit about going to bed. It was so tempting just to yell at her to go but I knew this way would herald better results. Sure enough I asked her to come for a hug and empathised about her not wanting to go to bed and sure enough she calmed right down and then willingly headed off to bed, more people need to know this, so simple but I guess human nature when someone is yelling and carrying on is to get mad or do the same thing back. It does take some restraint resist that urge and be empathetic

By: Nicole Schwarz

Nicole Schwarz — Sat, 27 Aug 2016 19:24:35 +0000

In reply to Christine. Love this! Thanks for sharing!

By: Christine

Christine — Fri, 26 Aug 2016 03:14:56 +0000

I have a toddler almost 2 years old. Bed time is difficult. There is a great deal of crying and coughing and winding up. All at those moments when calm and quiet are needed. What has helped is laying down with her. She is typically sitting up and crying. I’m lower than her. I then say “Are you feeling tired, sometimes when we are tired we can feel frustrated or sad” I tell her it is okay to feel sad and after a nice sleep she will feel better in the morning. Every time this happens she has responded so well. Almost immediately she takes a deep breath and lays down. Not exactly the same situation but it works so well.

By: Gary Cassidy

Gary Cassidy — Thu, 19 May 2016 00:58:22 +0000

I am an Occupational Therapist with over 30 years experience working with children. I learned the technique of getting down to children’s eye level or below many years ago as a high school student working in a preschool as an intern while taking a child development class. The empathy technique is a classic counseling method called primary accurate empathy,,, restating using the stressed individual’s own words to reassure them that their feelings are understood to develop trust and rapport. The method of paraphrasing is secondary accurate empathy.. summarizing the most important parts of their statements, designed to start to develop insight into the source of their feelings. These techniques work well with typically developing children, but can reinforce the negative behaviors in children with atypical sensory or cognitive function.

By: Nicole Schwarz

Nicole Schwarz — Wed, 11 May 2016 18:08:12 +0000

In reply to Elizabeth. Not sure this would be the tip I would recommend for a 17 year old, but you might be right about younger kids being easier! :)

By: Elizabeth

Elizabeth — Sun, 08 May 2016 10:29:52 +0000

How do you utilize this theory with a suddenly acting out 17 year old. I feel like my younger kids are easier. Lol.

By: Nicole Schwarz

Nicole Schwarz — Thu, 10 Mar 2016 20:28:57 +0000

In reply to Brenda. Hi! I'm not sure what you are referring to exactly, but for most kids getting down to their level and responding with a calm, neutral, empathetic response works well. Each child is different, of course, but it is definitely worth a try!