Thank you so much for sharing! That is a huge keep!! It’s amazing how powerful that word “perfect” can be. I love how you’ve found balance between being a patient, validating and kind parent who also sets limits and allows herself to have feelings too! What a great model for your child.

Nicole

I love how you do such a great job of encouraging us to be kind to ourselves as parents and model how to do that for our kids. This post is a perfect example.

I think the biggest keep for me this year fits in perfectly with your post. I realized not long ago that I often would be what I would call “Perfect Patient Encouraging Understanding Mama.” This meant that despite my melting down, screaming child, I kept a super calm voice, set limits and validated in a very firm but kind way, etc. I still think all of this is totally important. However, what I found was that when I tried to be too “perfect” about it, I would be SO patient and kind for SO long that I made no space for my own feelings and I would have to take so many deep breaths in order to not blow totally.

Now, while I am still very patient, validating and kind, there comes a limit. Then I say, I’ve had enough. It’s time to follow directions. Choose this or that please. Then I count to three, and VOILA! directions followed. I can praise the good choice, stay calm, and help the kids manage their feelings and reactions. This has helped me to feel much more successful and not overly frustrated. I also I don’t feel guilty for not having handled things the way I would have liked.

Thanks for all your ongoing insights.

Cheers,

Amy