We knew there was a storm brewing from the moment my daughter woke up. Crabby isn't the right word. We'll call it "off," just not right. It was a walking on eggshells kind of day. Still, we had errands to run, so we headed out to the mall, hoping things would blow over. And then...it happened. The public meltdown. She began to spiral … [Read more...]
Positive Parenting isn’t Perfect Parenting and that’s OK
Check out my latest post on Positive Parenting Connection: As a mom to three girls and as a child therapist, I've read piles of parenting books. My parenting philosophy has changed dramatically over the years. When I landed in the realm of "Positive Parenting," I was hooked. I knew instinctively this was how I wanted to parent. Unfortunately, … [Read more...]
When to praise your child (and when to skip it)
There's old parenting advice that tells us to give attention and praise when our kids do something good. Unfortunately, going overboard with "Good Job" may be making things worse, rather than better. Learn why it's OK not to praise your child for every.little.thing. My kids love to color. They can spend hours creating detailed pictures of … [Read more...]
Showing Your Child Support with Silence
Out of the blue, my daughter announced: "Ashlyn and Tyler don't talk to me on the bus." Shocked and caught off guard, I accidentally made a great parenting decision: I didn't say anything. She continued, "I know I'm quiet. Maybe they don't hear me talk, but I feel left out." I glanced her way to let her know I was listening but stayed … [Read more...]
One Tip to Get Your Kids Helping Around the House
The house is a mess. There are toys everywhere. The garbage needs to be emptied. The dishes are piled in the sink. And there are your 3 kids. Watching TV, playing on their phones, coloring. Absolutely not helping around the house. You've tried chore charts, you've tried bribing, you've tried taking things away until they complete their tasks. … [Read more...]
I’m Feeling Guilty for Yelling at My Child! 5 things you need to do now
Yelling is not the end of the story. You are not defined by the fact that you lost your cool. Next time you're feeling guilty for yelling at your child, take a deep breath. Then, follow these steps to move in a positive direction. You just yelled at your kids. And I mean, yelled. Despite your best efforts at calm, peaceful parenting, you … [Read more...]
Helping Your Child Through Disappointment
My most recent guest post on Positive Parenting Connection is about helping our kids through disappointment (and tips for managing our own reactions too!) The van is packed, and you're about ready to head out the door. Suddenly, you hear thunder in the distance. No! It can't be! You checked the weather, and it wasn't supposed to rain for a few … [Read more...]
How to break the cycle of anxiety in your family
You call out to your toddler who is scrambling up the jungle gym, "Be careful, honey! Watch out!" He decides it is too scary to climb and decides to go to the sandbox instead. You check your teen's grades online and realize there is missing work, "Don't you have math homework to do? Colleges look at these grades, you know!" She makes excuses and … [Read more...]
Help Your Child Express their Mixed-Up Feelings
If you've ever been the guest of honor at a surprise party you can relate to mixed-emotions. The flood of feelings can be overwhelming...surprise, joy, excitement, maybe shy because you didn't expect it or even a little upset that your friend didn't tell you. As adults, we understand that mixed-up feelings are part of a surprise party. In … [Read more...]
Love Past the Behavior
Your kids are curled up on the couch reading their new library books. No one is bickering. The silence is amazing. Your heart fills with love as you admire their sweet, innocent faces. Fast forward ten minutes. A fight breaks out over who has more of the blanket. You rush into the room, trying to help them make peace, but instead, your … [Read more...]