Connecting with little kids often means getting on the floor to play Legos or Barbies. A game of chase or a quiet snuggle was just part of the daily routine. Now your child is a tween and finding ways to connect seems to be less straightforward (and sometimes even awkward!). The announcement: “I don’t need you to walk me to the bus … [Read more...]
5 Confidence-boosting questions to ask when your child acts out
Let’s be honest. In the middle of a meltdown, my first question is: "How do I get them to calm down?" In the middle of a disagreement, my goal is: "How do I get them to agree with me?" In the middle of an argument, I plead: "How do I make this stop?" And, if we’re being totally honest...we know that these are the wrong questions. When we … [Read more...]
How (and when) to teach your kids a lesson
The screeching is piercing your ears. Like alarm bells in your head. Your body is flooded with panic and you will do practically anything to make it stop. Old parenting wisdom encouraged parents to intervene immediately, "Don't let them get away with this!" But recent brain research shows that kids can’t learn when they are at the height of a … [Read more...]
Listening well when your child is upset
The volcano has exploded. The floodgates are wide open. Your child is experiencing - and expressing - some BIG emotions. Your first instinct is to try to silence it: "Settle down. Calm down. You're fine." When that backfires, your own brain shifts into panic mode. Adrenaline pumps through your veins preparing your body to fight this (assumed) … [Read more...]
Positive Parenting: Handling Back Talk
The following is an excerpt from Rebecca Eanes' new book, The Positive Parenting Workbook. This inspiring and inviting guide walks readers through the process of charting a new path toward greater emotional awareness, clear communication, and joyful parenting! Filled with encouraging prompts and plenty of room to record your progress, this … [Read more...]
3 Words Your Child is Longing to Hear
The second I walk in the door, she’s on my heels. Showing me a thousand pictures, talking non-stop about her day, balancing on one foot, then the other. If I’m distracted, she might mix things up a little. Pulling on my sweater, singing at the top of her lungs, or whining. She wants my attention. But she wants more than just my gaze, she … [Read more...]
What to do when your child refuses to take a shower.
I’m not sure you saw the memo. I’m pretty sure it is delivered to all kids somewhere around age 9. Just in case you missed it, I’ll summarize: "Showers are bad. Stay dirty. Resist!" Yep. The child who could spend hours in the bathtub suddenly has a lack of affection for water. And it’s starting to stink. Addressing Shower … [Read more...]
What to do when you catch your child telling a lie
On your typical morning rounds of “clean-up-the-toy-tornado” you notice a new toy mixed in with the others. It wasn’t one that you purchased and it wasn’t a gift. Calling your child into the room, you ask, “Where did this come from?” “I don’t know,” she responds. Shifting her weight from one foot to the other and avoiding eye … [Read more...]
What to do when your kids argue about everything
“Please hang up your backpack” seems like such a simple request. Most days, it would happen without much of a fight. Today is not one of those days. This seemingly innocent phrase becomes just another thing on the long list of things your child refuses to do. Igniting yet another argument. Another screaming match. Another power … [Read more...]
3 Reasons Kids Avoid Taking Responsibility (and how to respond)
The house rattles from the intensity of their screams. By the time you enter the room, the argument is out of control. Opening a can of worms, you ask, “What’s going on!?” “He started it!” “No, he did!” “Did not!” “Did too!” This conversation is going nowhere. “One at a time...can you tell me what happened?” “Well...he wouldn’t … [Read more...]
